hmatt's blog

I’ve been trying to do things to train myself and my life to the way I want it to be. How I want to be. How life can be.

Something I was thinking about on the way to work is how intimidated or worried, or self-conscious I can be.. and how unproductive that all really is.

I once heard that you should strive to excel at whatever job you are at. At first this seems counter-intuitive; shouldn’t you be saving your energy for things that really matter? Well I’ll bet people say that because it helps you get in the habit of being awesome. Getting burnt out is a real thing no doubt, but giving up or not trying are the other options.

Those aren’t good options.

The other night I went to a bar with some friends. The music was TERRIBLE and the transitions between each song were very forced.. The biggest thing I noticed about myself is how I didn’t really dance it out. When I hear swing music I’m in my element. I’ll take the girl and do all sorts of goofy dance steps. But when trying to dance in large group circles I get all self conscious.

On Saturday I was talking to David L, all about interests I have and how I envision my life.. what I wish it was like.
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Years ago I was into vlogging. I still am, and I’ve been trying to put new things out.. but I haven’t.. why? Mostly because I felt unsupported. I don’t know any other vlogging types or barely any other blogging types. So what do I need? A support group!

I want to meet other vloggers and be able to talk about the challenges and positives of vlogging. = )

The same thing holds true for blogging. I’m going to make a list of all the bloggers I know. I’ve done this in the past, but I believe they its called a blogroll. My current blogroll list is available on http://hmatt.com/blog/links/

Anyway, I’ve toyed with the idea of starting up a Meetup group.. but I’d rather just join something! The amount of effort to set up a meeting (and the cost) make me shy away.. but if I don’t do it where am I? I can’t just wait for someone else to do things all the time. If I want something done I’ll have to do it myself.

I’m adding this project for the month of April.. to have a vlogger/blogger meeting! I’ll have to do a lot of things to make this a reality. 1) pick a place that is big enough for people (and also small enough in case we don’t have many people show), 2) create some sort of atmosphere and plan to make everyone feel comfortable, 3) network and advertise so I can get to know if there are any other places I can go..

I tried looking for “los angeles vloggers” and old 2005 and 2006 posts came up…

although just looking at it again I found some geek meetings all about social media. A lot of them are competing with one another, but instead of focusing on making an ongoing series (or obligation). I’ll create some fun vlog challenges and topics to discuss. I’m not sure what I’m expecting.. but it would sure be nice to see what other people are up to.

Hmm.. what is it about me and getting all excited about things that are no longer in fad. It sure makes it difficult to find like-minded individuals! = /

I wonder though if these geek dinners are all about super intense stuff and if will be full of programmers or internet rockstars. Although- who cares really? I’m not about to be intimidated by other internet folk because they are more ‘internet popular’ than me. How will I be able to immerse myself in that type of culture if I’m always on the sidelines.

gee whiz.. I’m always on the search for “my people”.

A draft of my internet vlogging vision is available on http://hmatt.com/blog/vlogging/

That’s it for now I suppose.

Every trip on the metro home I feel my eyelids get heavy. By the time I came in my door I dropped everything and went to sleep.

That was at 7pm. Then I awoke at midnight.

I’ve been wasting the hours away reading online and watching the office on hulu.

Then I read this article on cbs – it was an interview about the financial crisis & the fed reserve.

Like a lot of people, I’m confused why the tax payers are throwing tons of money to bailout companies. The seemingly logical thing to do would be to let them fail and then move on. Then the counter argument begins.. if we did that then it would make other things collapse.

Quite true. So now we as the American people are left in a quagmire where we have to ‘save’ these banks that continue making bad choices and giving out bonuses.. it is all frustrating.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/03/12/60minutes/main4862191_page2.shtml

This article kind of lets some insight on how the Fed reserve has been battling this crisis. The end result is that they’ve been ‘printing money’. Which will cause a HUGE problem if things aren’t dismantled properly after we have some stability. Otherwise we’ll end up like some of those markets on the other side of the world. I remember hearing a story about the money (rubles?) being used to burn for heat because there was so much of it. An entire wheelbarrow of printed money was required for a loaf of bread.

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I wonder when the movie Atlas Shrugged will come out, it would be a very interesting topic to discuss with people. If you haven’t read this before it deals with a market in turmoil; a very timely piece.

Okay.. I have to be at work later today.. I’m still not tired again, but it is hard to force myself back to sleep. I spent 99 cents on an app that allows me to play rain sounds to get to sleep.. I’ll try that again I suppose.

I do miss those ‘healthy’ sounds. When it rains here I get kind of homesick and miss the green forests of the northwest..

but I’ll be so glad when it gets warm again. I’m growing very sick of being cold all the time.